Today I just got over an extremely stressful school day. I found that college is just filled with days that you hope you can accomplish or “pull off.” After three years, I finally figured the common theme. With assignments due left and right and a test that evoked severe anxiety, the day was just viewed as “something I needed to get done.” Once the tests were submitted, the assignments were handed in, and the stress lowered, I rushed to the airport to catch the flight I am on currently. Finally some relaxation. Even with the sudden burst of peace of the mind, I still remain in semi-anxiety mode by:
- The assignment I need to submit as soon as I land
- The scholarship that will be reviewed in a few hours
- A phone-interview for the lead position at the store I work tomorrow
“Is that what you call relaxation Jordyn?” Well yes, it is. Working hard is the only way I know, so please do not mock me for my insane mindset. Stress is always an understatement it seems like, but about 30-minutes ago, I was hit with a wave of thankful thinking.
For a few months now, I have been taking the time in between sitting down in my seat on the airplane to reaching the maximum cruise altitude as a time of meditation and praise. If you check my Apple Music, I have a few of my favorite worship songs loaded onto my phone for offline playing.
If you were wondering, here is the list:
- Open Heaven by Hillsong
- Everything by Lifehouse
- Closer Than You Know by Hillsong
- Open Heaven by Jesus Culture
- Praises (Be Lifted High) by Josh Baldwin
I blast my worship music and either stare at the window or close my eyes. I found that this time that I take to do this not only calms my mind as I start my plane ride, but it also just resets my faith for the day. Especially with the stress I have been experiencing, I tend to lose my focus on God and my determination to be as Christ-like as possible. Moments like these are normal for me. I love to take time for Him. Honestly the moments of meditation move me and inspire me. Like right now, I always find myself finding realizations that I need.
The first picture is of the plane in the clouds. To me, clouds represent wonder, thinking, happiness, and elevation. At the moment the picture was taken, I was listening to Everything by Lifehouse. This song holds such a place in heart because it was the song I became in love with at the time where my faith was renewed. While listening, I was stuck by the words
“How can I stand here with you and not be moved by you.”
“You hold me in your hands, you won’t let me fall.”
In the clouds, I believe, you are relatively closer to God than many others at the time. You are raised thousands of feet off the ground when in the clouds. I realized that even though I wasn’t necessarily standing there with him, I was close so why not use that closeness as way to be moved. This began my thought process.
The second picture is the beautiful sunset that I was graced with as we were reaching our cruise altitude. I have been traveling my entire life and cannot even begin to count the amount of plane rides I have taken in my almost nineteen years of life. Only recently, though, I have found a new found appreciation for the wonders of flying thousands of miles in the air in “super speed.” One of the greatest sights in my eyes is the sunset. Sunsets change each day and are different in each place you are in, but still beautiful every time. Seeing the sunset tonight reminded me of the wondrous creations of my God. Wow, I am so blessed. The world is beautiful. To think that a God who created such a beautiful world was so gracious enough to take time to call me by name and create me. Purposely me. Amazing.
The last picture is a screenshot of a video of lightning strikes from above the clouds. I am sure I have seen lightning in this way before, but I was completely loss of words by the sudden bursts of light in the dark, grey clouds. Lightning is something that many people fear of being close to. For my flight, the storm underneath us caused turbulence for a while and shook the plane. There are a lot of negative connotations with lighting as well in literature. Why is lighting seen as bad? This is gorgeous and not to mention so interesting to watch. The lighting reminded me that even the storm we were traveling through was beautiful, which related to the stress I have been struggling with. Yes, my day was a bit difficult and nerve-wrecking, but there was so much beauty that happened throughout and after the storm:
I completed everything I needed to complete today.
I sat in one of my classes, surrounded with five new friends. They greeted me with such kindness as they do every time.
I am ON A PLANE to spend a well-needed weekend with the man that I love.
I am now able to catch up on my TV shows, write on my blog, edit my upcoming video, and overall become more creative again.
I have a family that supports me and my life decisions.
I am thankful, so very thankful. I thank God for everything he has blessed me with. Without him, my view on the world wouldn’t be so optimistic, my weaknesses would never turn into strengths, my hope would be lost, and I for sure would not be granted so many things that I feel that I sometimes do not deserve. With him, my worry and my stress are gone. No matter how many things I have to stress over, I am trying my hardest to every second choose to not let it get to me. My problems are not bigger than my God. My problems ARE NOT even close to being bigger than my God. Because of his unfailing love, I am able to see the world with such beauty. At this very second, especially since I am a few thousands feet off the ground, heaven is closer than I know.